My Story
Our Sports Story🎥
I never planned this, never meant to be a ‘sport parent’, it just happened and kept happening as Lily’s gymnastics career snowballed in front of us.
The progression was so gradual that I didn’t notice the mounting pressure it was putting on her, me, and our family. The judgement was subtle, but always lingering; lack of support from those around us, snide comments from acquaintances, the general suggestion that I had unrealised dreams of wanting to be gymnast and I was somehow living through my child. No one seemed to understand that this wasn’t my dream, I was being dragged through this world by a small person in a sparkly leotard.
There is a misconception that successful sporting children are stronger, more independent, and more resilient than others and therefore do not need so much parenting. In fact, the opposite is true. They are under so much pressure, more pressure than some of us will experience in a lifetime and therefore as parents we must bring our A-Game, every day.
Every car journey is a test with the threat that the simplest passing comment may cause damage. The nature of their world means that our children are both the strongest and the most vulnerable in equal measures.
But the pride, oh my goodness the pride. We are in awe of Lily, her dedication, passion, and grit are awe-inspiring. I am honoured to be her Mum and to have been able to support her on this journey.
Age 2 - Started Toddler Gymnastics
Age 4 - First Competion: Won Gold
Age 5 - Invited to join squad: Training 6 hours a week
Age 7 - First Regional Compeition: Won Gold
Age 8 - Progressed to FIG (International level): Training 14 hours a week
Age 9 - First Overseas Competition: Placed 5th
Age 10 - Joined the Brtitish Team: Training 18 hours a week
It would be wrong of me now not to mention my other daughter Evie who has had to grow up in the shadow of her sister. She has made the most sacrifice; missing out on holidays, only allowed to do clubs that don’t coincide with the gym-run and worst of all, being mistaken for Lily all too often and having to listen to adults rave about her ‘gymnastic success.’ She is my other little warrior, and it has taken me a long time to get the balance right between my two girls.
My LIGHTBULB Moment💡
It was 2017, Lily was 9 years old, competing at an international level in aerobic gymnastics. I was sitting in the stands of a major international competition chatting to another mum about how I supported Lily through her training when she uttered those memorable words; "I wish you could help me, Jen! I haven't got a clue what I'm doing!" it was a passing comment for her, a life-changing moment for me.
I stared around the stands. There must have been 200 children competing that day, all training at least 10 hours a week probably more, all competing at the highest of levels. The pressure is indescribable, for both parent and child.
I thought to myself, she's right, there's no support out there for us and none of us have got a clue what we're doing!
"I wish you could help me Jen!
I haven't got a clue what I'm doing!"
My Journey🌍
I went back to university and did a master's degree in sport and exercise psychology and for my final dissertation designed and tested the Super-P Approach. The study proved that using the Super-P approach reduces anxiety in child athletes. I am now doing a PhD to further improve and test Super-P.
It is very important to me that my support program was designed using sport psychology research - this is NOT about me lecturing you on what you should or shouldn't be doing based on my experience of raising one child in sport! My personal experience gives me is empathy for the tough journey I know that you are on, my scientific expertise allows me to help and guide you.
Super-P is applicable to all sports and useful at any stage - but honestly, I wish I had known what I know now when Lily first started gymnastics - would have made so many stressful situations far more bearable.
My Mission💪
I am a huge advocate of parents in sport . We are warriors; we are the money, the taxi, the organisation, the time, the sacrifice, the power, the force, behind every child.
Behind every goal or medal there is a Dad who drove tirelessly up and down the motorway, there is a Mum who cancelled plans to attend an unexpected match, there is a family that sacrificed money, time, holidays, weekends away and social events, endless, endless amounts of sacrifice.
I want parents in sport to be honoured, adored, praised and glorified! We get criticised for doing the wrong thing, but no one tells us what the right thing to do is. I have spent years designing a course that gives parents guidelines for every situation they will encounter in sport; it is easy to understand, easy to remember and easy to apply.
